Blissfully Married....Still!

Phill and I celebrated our wedding anniversary today! We had breakfast at a local cafe and I had an entree size of the cafe's Big Breakfast which had bacon, sausage, eggs, mushroom and hash brown and it was YUM! Phill had a foccacia and a big glass of iced chocolate. It was a yummy meal and something different than a dinner as we've had quite a few nice dinners recently. We also received sweet sms-s from ah yi (thanks!) and our parents (altho mine sms-d, his called - has to do with distance).

It's been 2 years since we celebrated our special day with family and friends. We recounted the day saying things like:
Phill:"I picked you up from your house at this time".
Vic:"We arrived at our hotel around this time".
Phill:"We had our wedding ceremony about now".

The memories of our wedding day still remain strong and it was a beautiful and special day that is worth reliving again and again. I can remember how happy I felt, we felt, and I remember wishing I could have all my family and friends in the same room again, without me having to wear an elaborate dress this time.

Let Me Not Be Ashamed

Unto thee O Lord, do I lift up my soul.
Unto thee O Lord, do I lift up my soul.
Oh my God, I trust in Thee,
Let me not be ashamed, let not my enemies triumph over me.

Let none that wait, on Thee be ashamed.
Let none that wait, on Thee be ashamed.
Oh my God, I trust in thee,
Let me not be ashamed, let not my enemies triumph over me.

Show me Thy ways, Lord teach me Thy paths.
Show me Thy ways, Lord teach me Thy paths.
Oh my God, I trust in Thee,
Let me not be ashamed, let not my enemies triumph over me.

The above song was one of the few songs we sang in church this morning but this one particular song so resonated within me that my tears just flowed freely. It spoke to me especially the line "let me not be ashamed, let not my enemies triumph over me". Thinking about my work situation and feeling like I'm being treated like a fool, it was so good just to be able to sing my woes to God. I didn't know how to express myself but thankfully through this song, I could. And always, after church, I always feel better about a situation I may feel sad or sore or upset about. It'll be like suddenly the clouds will disappear and things are not as bad and I can focus on the merits of the situation and not just see the gloom and doom and be despondent. I sink to the depths of being down and depressed, however, when I don't hear His Voice and talk to Him. I need my Saviour!

What Makes A Good Boss?

The unpleasant work environment I'm currently in, which sometimes feels toxic, has pushed me to compile a list of what makes a good boss (to me):

1. Reasonable (preferably, don't say no when I want to take annual leave cos I'm willing to complete my tasks and do my handover to whoever is handling my work in the meantime);
2. Even-tempered (nothing worse than a boss that stomps to work, grumpy as anything, and then another day, act like you're his/her friend???!!! Schizo?);
3. Organised (I don't like a boss who sits on work and then with 1 or 2 days to go, pass it onto me to complete before the deadine - in QUICK TIME - when he/ she had it weeks ago!!!);
4. Know their stuff (please don't try and correct me when I know you don't know what you're talking about and you're trying to behave like you do - don't insult yourself and me!);
5. Don't wield their authority cos they can (A boss needs to realise they don't own their staff but do own their output and don't say "No" cos you can, definitely leaves a sour taste on one's mouth);
6. Sets an example (I have a supervisor who expects me to do as she says but not as she does. One eg, I wanted to take half-pay leave, she said I can only take some of my leave half-pay even though she takes ALL of her leave on half-pay - why? cos she can, she's my supervisor);
7. Doesn't lie or gossip (nothing worse than discovering your manager will never tell you or your colleagues what he thinks but he sure will tell you what he doesn't like about your colleagues and vice versa, unfounded or not - very unprofessional and immature.);
8. Willing to share their knowledge and teach (Some are born teachers, others are not, but as long as one is willing to teach, the workload can be shared. I am not learning as much as I can in my present job cos I am held back and not involved in the main work and in meetings [only involved with 3 since I started work]. Mostly doing admin and project management which is only part of my job description.);
9. Stands up for me (My supervisor is definitely quick to stand up for me when external party questions my work, which I appreciate.)
10. Trusts me (If you have given me a task, taught me, given me a deadline, please do not stand over my shoulder and watch while I work or call me every 1 hour to ask for an update. I can and will do it and will show you. If I can't, I'll ask you.)

That is my list so far. With more work experience, the list might grow longer.

This past week, it hasn't been as bad as it was previously. But I found out that a training course I wanted to attend and which my supervisor said wasn't that great and I can read it from a book, I found out she signed herself and the manager up for it???!!!! And then the manager said she's a good supervisor because she is firm and puts her foot down (I am neither rebellious nor recalcitrant, why does she need to put her foot down with me?) and the other supervisor should learn from her?! Yes, if one intends to make it onto the list of poor quality bosses.

Money article on "How Good A Boss Are You" -- http://money.cnn.com/2006/09/27/news/economy/annie_927.fortune/index.htm

A hero mourned

The funeral for Brendan Keilor, the lawyer who died helping a lady who was in danger from a gunman, was held today. Reading several articles about his funeral, one statement struck me and will stay with me for a long time. His wife, Alice, had mentioned, and this was part of the eulogy given by one of Brendan's close friends, which was Brendan had to do what he did because to walk away "would have made him party to it". This reminds me of a bible verse (which I have trouble finding) which goes something like if you know what is good and do not do it, that is sin.

And after reading Frank and Chris' comments in my earlier post, I now understand how rare a person such as Brendan is because most of us (me included) will calculate the cost before we step forward to help a fellow man. Yet the bible said, "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:13) Yet the lady Brendan helped wasn't a friend, she was a stranger, which makes him one special HERO!

Shooting in Melbourne - 1 dead!

I read this The Age article this afternoon abut a shooting in Melbourne this morning!!! 1 guy died trying to shield a woman from being shot by a gunman! This is so unreal....

After work, I got onto MSN Messenger and had a short discussion with my friend, Frank, in Singapore about the shooting. And he said as a father with 2 kids, he's not sure he'll be so quick to help because he has 2 kids - definitely understandable cos if I have kids, I'll definitely think of them first. But I told him when things such as this happens, you don't give yourself time to think, you just re-act, and based on the kind of person you are, you either step forward to help or run away.

The guy who died, a lawyer, happens to have 3 young kids. Now, they are left fatherless....their father set them the ultimate example by giving his life for another!

Gaining Peace

During church today, when I was still very troubled and frustrated with what had happened at work the past week, one of the bible verses cited were the following:

Philippians 4:10-13 (NIV-UK)
10 I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it.
11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.
12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.
13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

I've heard people use the expression of words jumping off the page to speak to you and the above verses did, when I thought about the apostle Paul in chains and writing the above letter to the Philippians. Especially verse 13, "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength". I realised then that I've tried to survive at work on my own strength and that I really need to lean on God and depend on Him. And even when some people are so difficult to love, I can speak to Him about it who will help me do that.

You know, I find loving your enemies one of the most difficult things to do:
"But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you." (Luke 6:27-28).

For people who want the worst for you, who take delight in seeing bad things happen to you, who plot to trip you up, HOW DO I LOVE THEM? I WANT TO HATE THEM!!! That's why I love growing old, then with experience in life, I hope not too many things will faze or ruffle my feathers and my tolerance will be higher. And also, I can't love my enemies. But God can do so, and I can, only through Him who gives me strength. I'm still learning...

Dreamt of a Daughter

After coming across this blogger's website and seeing the cute pic of her son, I had a dream last night and dreamt that I had a daughter, about 3, who looked like Phill but had my stubborn personality. And when I told her to do stuff, she kept saying, "No, Mummy!". I almost wanted to smack her! But she was sooooo cute! What a sweet dream that I hope will come true one day, minus the stubborn, disobedient part pls.

Simplify Your Life

I was reading this article about happiness at work and remember another forwarded email previously about having more control over your life by simplfying your life. The writer then went on to say that because most people are materialistic, they amass alot of debt and feel stuck in a lousy job because they have bills to pay. But if we simplify our lives, we would have more control over our lives and feel less bound (ball and chained) to a lousy job.

Which then begs the question? Is it better to be in a lower-paying job but happy, or higher-paying job but unhappy? Ideally, the former, but depends on how lowly paid. If it's too drastically lowly paid to the point you feel you're giving to charity by continuing to work for the company, then probably not.

I'm in a higher paid job now and admittedly, I was happy with the potential the job brings - still am. And I'm enjoying moving into this new field and learning so many different things. Thankfully, I found myself liking this shift in occupation. However....I've been having some problems with my supervisor, to the point that the other supervisor in our team (2 supervisors and 1 manager overseeing them) has approached me several times to ask if I'm okay and question why I've been treated the way I have - no idea (my supervisor can be unpredictable in moods and I feel at times of being bullied). I'm trying to hang in there and wait until a year before I suggest being transferred.

I don't want to be a wimp cos I know friends and even family have had difficult/ nasty bosses to work with but when it affects a huge part of your life, you wonder sometimes if it's time to make a choice to be happy. However, on a website that I read http://www.bigbadboss.com, being happy is sometimes the sweetest revenge.

An Unplanned Drive

My parents-in-law, Phill and I went to Violet Town bushmarket this morning and while we were driving back to Benalla for me to pick up some stuff, we were talking about this nice, scenic town, Yarrawonga, and Phill said, "let's go there". And so, we did.

We had fun! It was about almost an hour's drive there but considering it was the long weekend (Queen's Birthday on Monday), the traffic at Yarrawonga wasn't bad. We had lunch at the RSL (Returned Services League) Club there and I had a mushroom and chicken penne, which was YUM! What I was impressed with was a big airforce plane placed in front of the RSL Club. It drew customers there like bees to honey. I suppose having the pokies (jackpot machinese) helped too. We did a short drive around and then we were homeward bound.